Monday, June 20, 2011

Retool and Refit

The Windermere Marathon is DONE!!! We not ony survived it, but finished it at around the time we hoped and without serious injury. A lot of time, effort, and energy went into it and I can say that I am proud that I was able to finish what I started (despite so many folks telling me that I couldn't because of my prior injuries and my mental issues). So what now??? I plan to continue to train for my physical and mental health - I want this to be a part of my life for as long as possible.

Well, the long, hot south Mississippi summer has started (actually tomorrow is the "official start", but already faced a couple of triple digit days), the local racing season is over for awhile, and I face several new challenges regarding family issues and my son. These challenges will be more taxing than any marathon, but like the marathon - I will endure, continue and do the best that I can do. So, I am regrouping - continuing to train with a return to a more balanced fitness program that includes my boxing/martial arts training, stretching, strength training and of course, continued road work. And - more important, I will continue to work at being a good father to my son and becoming a good husband to my spouse (funny to say that after being "life partners" for years).

This past week was my first scheduled "off-week" or non-training week in a long, long while. We only did a very light session of stretching and some informal session of strength training that we felt we needed to complete from our "post-marathon" 4 week schedule. This week, we hope to a start a short 5 week phase that works towards developing the triad training method that I hope will "take" and become my summer training schedule and "maybe" more of my overall way of living my life. Maybe this will create that fluid balance that I need to maintain my mental health as well as possible. The stressors of the past month or so - should have or could have easily pushed me over the edge - but well, I struggled through brief periods of depression, a few sleepless nights and of course, that "wonderful" self-guilt I carry around ... we didn't crash and burn. So, that's a good thing!

As for the running (road work) - I am completely aware that I am NOT an elite runner, nor never will be. The injuries from my past will never allow for that and that's just a simple fact. I accept that fact, and it really has not been my desire to be an "elite" anything, because nearly 3 years ago - I changed gears and my training is personal and bound in reasons that relate to finding "peace" in my mental illnesses. I shy ayay from any "lime-light" and search only to be "content" and ale to maintain a "sort-of" fluid balance within myself.

In all honesty, I have had more than my share of excitement, challenges, and "attention" - both good and bad - in my past, and now, I have no desire to return to that place or time. I seek to find peace and contentment from what most would called "boring" but that's what I like and I call it living as simple as possible.

Later ...

Tuesday, June 14, 2011


It has been a long path to start writing here again. I have struggled with extreme paranoia after some very, very negative comments made here. Yes, I know I’m not a elite runner (never claimed to be) … yes, I am not much of a writer either (kind-of happens when you have learning disabilities) … and yes, I am pretty boring these days (and you know what – that’s the way I like it), so to anyone that cares to read this – fine and if you don’t like it … no problem!

Recently (May 7th), my life partner and I were legally married. I put it that way because in our hearts and soul (and the eyes of our higher power) we have been “married” for many years, but now – it is on paper and on the record. And how did we spend our “honeymoon” – a trip to Spokane, Washington where the following Saturday (May 14th),
I completed the Windermere Marathon! Sure, not a big deal for most, but after my physical problems (being told I should never run again), facing my mental disorders and illnesses, and just getting older … it was a big achievement for me. And more important, I ran for a reason – in honor of my life-partner’s brother that passed away from brain cancer and for my brother that was hit by a car and died. It was a very, very positive experience for me.

The training for the marathon was very time-consuming … and probably the most “selfish” thing that I have ever done for myself. I’m not one to do for myself – and I am probably one of the most guilt-ridden beings I know and an extreme worrier to boot. These are just a couple of the lesser characteristics of my mental conditions. However, “we” won’t go into that here. The long hours training compared to my earlier days when training for martial arts and kickboxing, but it was different in the fact that I did it alone for the most part. And the training served me well as I did complete the Windermere Marathon for the right reasons.

So, for now – I will try to post on occasion about my life in general and my path. Feel free to read and rip … or merely comment if you like. If it gets to be too much – I will just go into closed mode again.

Thanks for the time …